This Way Up

Normally when it comes to a roast chicken it's me who has their hand up its arse, removing the giblets, and me who oils it before laying it in a roasting dish with some potatoes and lard. Today, however, I disappeared with Bison Daughter to buy a halloween costume, leaving Mrs Bison to explore the nether regions of the chicken, a task which she loathes. Eventually the bird was cooked and she dragged me away from the Dallas-Arizona football game to complain about it. The chicken was on a plate and she'd started carving it but there didn't seem to be any meat on it. It was all bones, and appeared to have been squashed at some point.

"This is bullshit" exclaimed I, "where did you buy this? Take a photo - we're getting our money back on this."



Fortunately I took a moment to try turning it over, and there was all the meat, along with a plastic timer which was sticking up. She'd roasted it upside down. It turned out to be an excellent dinner, regardless of which way the chicken was sitting in the oven. Actually, the meat was more tender than usual, so maybe we should try this again. It's not like Mrs Bison doesn't know how to cook a chicken, you understand. However, she blamed the mistake on the trauma she experienced handling its entrails, because I wasn't there to do it. So obviously it's my fault...